Failures Are Better Than Short-lived Success

Failures Are Better Than Short-lived Success

Was greeted by a familiar news today in the morning. Yet another child committed suicide due to excessive pressure from school and parents. A really sad and bad way of starting the day. So what do we do about it? Simple, shut down the laptop and forget about it. Out of sight and out of mind. Perfect solution, right? Guess not. These suicides by little children have become a norm of the day and one day we too will have kids and if things don’t change by then, our kids too will face the same pressures and one day maybe they too will become a news item for others to just read click their throats and forget all about them.

Is this really the future that we want for our children? Is this what we really want for our, in fact, for all the children of the world? If no, then let’s come together and change what is wrong with the world where we are putting so much pressure for success on these poor little souls that they are breaking to the point of killing themselves. This change will have to start from within us.

Most kids who are saved after their suicide attempts and asked about the reasons that pushed them towards taking this ghastly step stated that, they did it because they were basically trying to escape a situation which they felt they just could not deal with. So, what were those situations? A survey shows that there are many factors like broken homes, abusive parents and other similar problems but the most common problem which maximum number of students faced was that of the pressure to succeed where failure as an option was just not provided to them.

Let’s look at some of the big changes that we need to bring about in the education system which will help in fighting these depressive cases.

Teach The Meaning Of failure At Schools

This is apparently the biggest problem. Schools do not teach the true meaning of failure and as a result of this ignorance, any sort of failure of the child, no matter how small and inconsequential, drive the students right into the arms of depression. It is important that the kids are told that being imperfect is just fine. Failure, in fact, is a stepping stone to success. The school will have to play a very important role in making the kids understand that it is not a crime, as most of them find, to fail. But, are the schools of today really working towards this end? Are they providing the necessary guidance and support to their students to cope up with the increased pressure that these kids are feeling? I don’t think so. In, fact, what I find is that the schools are playing a major role in increasing the pressure to succeed on these poor kids.

Academics, Sports, Creative Classes, Debates, Cultural Fests: Where Do We Stop Demanding From The Kids

It has become important that the kid needs to excel not just in academics but also in sports and many other extra curricular activities. The kids are expected to attend school, then go to some after school sports camps, then attend some dance classes or drawing classes or creative writing classes, the hopes and expectations from these kids just never end. Have we completely forgotten that these are little children and not performance machines? Do we not remember our childhood, when all we wanted to do was play and have fun? Why are we doing this to our kids? Why is it that when a kid tells everyone that he would not be able to cope with the pressure, nobody listens and tells him back that failure in exam is highly discouraged and not an option for him? Why have we become so insensitive?

I think it is high time that we all stopped for some time in our routine lives and seriously think about all of the above WHYs. Michael Gervais explains the need and importance of giving the children a better and a more fun loving environment for learning so that they are mentally stronger in dealing with the various challenges that may come their way. He clearly explains about the various pressures that kids today face and how one should deal with them in the attached video- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCjcGjJaJSw

Peer Pressure Also Adds To The Woes Of These Kids

Steven Sussman, Ph.D, who is a child and adolescent psychologist and also the co-founder of the child and teen success centers in New York and New Jersey, explains in his video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-QU9kCwue4 how peer pressure is also a major contributory factor in causing depression among kids. This peer pressure exists both in schools as well as at homes. Constant comparisons between children can make the weaker child feel useless. This can sometimes prove to be really a contradiction of sorts. While on one hand it is important that the achievements of a kids are given due importance and he is applauded for the efforts, it is also important to bear in mind, that while doing so, you do not end up discouraging other weaker students.

It is about time that schools and parents understand that failure is not a fault of the child. I mean, it is not as if the child did it on purpose, right, or it’s not that the student has not taken any efforts. We all need to understand here that for most cases, the students learning cycle takes more time than what is given to him.

So, what do you think? Do you also think that harsh punishments are the best way to get the kid to perform well in his or her academics and school activities or do you agree with me when I say that providing the kids with a more lovable and fun learning environment will help both (us and the kid) in making a better future? Would love to know what your comments and suggestions on this matter are.